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Posts Tagged ‘love’

Rain

I’m looking outside at the rain and I have this feeling like I’m trying to collect it in my hands, but it keeps slipping through my fingers. God has given me countless blessings, but I can’t seem to keep them. My clothes are soaking through with grace, but I can’t catch the rain. It’s all too much and too little at the same time.

It’s like standing on the opposite side of the train station from someone you want to meet, with tracks in between. Close enough to say hi, but not enough time. And in a moment the feet will mean miles.

It seems the only thing between you and the gold metal is yourself.

It’s being in the right place but feeling like the wrong person. Or being the right person while feeling lost. It’s caring so much, yet not enough. Does it matter if I say ‘I love you’ and mean it when you don’t even feel it?

I think so, because Jesus cries for some who will never see his tears.

I wish you could feel what I do when I think of you, then you would know. How can I be so articulate, yet unable to express it? How can we speak the same language, yet the words be inadequate? Why must love be kept secret? Please Jesus… help them hear it.

I’m at the end of myself, in need of your help. Where once I had feeble strength to claim, now I call your name. Help me to catch the rain.

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True


You are the greatest man who ever lived, and lives. You are the truest lover a heart could ever know. You are the best kind of friend, a brother to the soul. You define the way to be beautiful.

You delight in loving me, but who can count the tears you’ve cried for love of me? Who can tell of the nights I didn’t come home and left you alone. Who can erase the look on your face as I walked away?

It’s not that you needed me, but I needed you. And only you knew.

I made you sick with despair. You fasted, but your prayers seemed unanswered. You grieved as though I were your family, your friend. When I was sick, you held me close. When I was well, I let you go. But I knew I was never alone.

I’ve never deserved you, but I was always worth it to you. I’ve only wasted time asking why… it must be because of who you are, not who I am. It’s who you’ve always been.

And now I breathe you in like oxygen. All that time I was gone, and you never left. I took you for granted, but you never loved me less.

I know until the end I won’t find a better friend. Time after time, you’ve proven yourself. Through and through, you are true. And if I dream to do anything well in this life, it’s to love you too, with love so true.

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The essential gift

Love requires all. Holding back, limits and conditions, calculating and speculating… that all means something, but it’s not loving.

Love is self-abandonment, not self-fulfillment. Yet to love is to fulfill your purpose. To love is to become like God.

Love should be given because of who we are, not who they are. Love knows no preference and goes beyond reason. Love is not fair. Love is not earned – it can never be deserved.

Please don’t work for love – you can never pay enough. Besides, it has been bought. Already paid for and signed with blood. You could never pay that much.

The essence of love is the gift of it. If you worked for it, and earned it on condition, you might win affection, but don’t call it love. Being loved was never your choice. You either are, or you’re not. And you are. Loved by God. God, who is sovereign and good. God, who is essentially Love.

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Love’s brutality

God’s love is tough. I’m being reminded that he is God, and I am not. I’m realizing my life is not my own at all. ‘For from him and through him and to him are all things.’ (Rom. 11:36) I make my plans. I take my steps. But he is redirecting my path. What I try to keep alive for myself, he keeps putting to death. Yet I find life in the aftermath.

I’m so fragile. A thousand things could fall apart today that I could never put back together again. The stars could fall. The earth could quake. My family could separate. My friends could walk away. My heart could break. But it’s ironic to think that among the things I can’t control, God’s love is the most threatening force of all.

God’s love is as strong as death and his jealousy is as fierce as the grave. It is a flame that many waters cannot quench and floods cannot drown. It is a consuming fire that burns away everything in its path. It is a mighty wind and a wild current. It weighs like gravity upon my soul and lifts me up like the wings of an eagle.

From the highest mountain to the deepest ocean, his love is. Beyond, before, behind, below, above, around, and within is his love. Greater than the sun, yet present in the atom. It can’t be outrun or undone. It can’t be fooled or controlled. His love is full of intention, precision, perfection. Searching my heart like a surgeon. Shocking me to find a pulse. Running through my veins like blood. Wrecking and redeeming the depths of my soul. There is no place he won’t invade to break me and make me whole.

However tough his love must be on me, he suffered love’s greatest brutality. I am broken, but he was crushed. I am disciplined, but he was punished. I am pruned, but he was abused. I taste only a drop from the cup that he drank to the bottom. I die to live, but he lived to die.

Whatever I must endure for the sake of love, it is only redemption. However I am pressed, it is only for the best. Love will not leave me with less. Love will not rest until I am blameless. Perfected. Wearing white as his spotless bride. Altogether lovely, fully alive.

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Love, and the lack of

What do you want most in life? I was asked the other day. The question got my soul’s attention, and it didn’t take me too long to respond… “To matter.”

Thinking about it later, I want not only to matter, but to matter specifically by making a good difference.

I thought of those who have mattered to me. There was a simple truth underneath. All of those who have mattered to me have either made a good difference in my life, or a bad one. And it has all come down to love, or the lack of.

There are those I wish didn’t matter so much to me, because they’ve made a bad difference in my life. Is it because they haven’t achieved their goals in life? Is it their field of work that makes a difference? Is it who they are? No. It is only their lack of love.

I’ve known a strong leader whose weak love led me quicker to defeat than to victory. I’ve known great doctors whose careless hands healed my body but wounded my soul. I’ve known good shepherds who by their words gather sheep while they scatter the flock by their deeds. Their instruction soon means nothing to me.

I know the most gifted musicians, even anointed worship leaders, whose angel voices I would less like to hear than a tone deaf friend singing in my ear. Their lovely yet loveless songs knock pointlessly on a long locked door of my heart. Write down their lyrics and project them on the walls, but I can’t see them and I can’t feel them past my wounds left by their lack of love.

If it weren’t for Love himself, the truth in 1 Corinthians 13 would have me crushed.

Whatever you do in life, whether it is writing, singing, speaking, mothering, fathering. Whatever your field of work, whether inventing, engineering, teaching, managing, nursing, building, programming. Whoever you are, whether son, daughter, student, teacher, sister, brother, employee, boss, friend, mentor. Whatever you do, in whatever field, as whoever you are, you do nothing and go nowhere and matter not if you live without love.

Authors, your words have no message without love. Singers, your voice has no power without love. Teachers, your lessons hold no meaning without love. Pastors, your sermons make no difference without love. People, you’re wasting your time without love. Love for God, proving itself in love for others.

You can write better than Shakespeare and direct better than Steven Spielberg. You can dance better than Michael Jackson and sing better than Mariah Carey. You can invent more than Thomas Edison and give more than Mother Teresa. You can teach better than Eistein and preach better than Spurgeon. But when all is said and done, without love, you do nothing for God, for yourself, or for those around you. You don’t mean much to the world, or to your own little world, unless you love much.

No matter what we do, if we do not love, we make no good difference at all. Only love makes a real difference. Only love makes us truly great. It’s better to be a janitor who loves than a king who doesn’t. It’s better to reach just one person in love than to leave a thousand untouched. The greater our position of influence, the greater our responsibility to love, and the greater the damage when we don’t.

‘If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.’ (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

If this new year I make one resolution, it is to know Love, and to love much.

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